PROM KING

Dear All,

Prom night's getting closer.For Americans,it's one of the most important nights of their lives and,even if you deny it,I know you are excited about it too.One of the most famous American traditions is choosing a Prom King and a Prom Queen who, as you must have seen in many teen movies (=pelis de adolescentes yankees), head the ball (=encabezan el baile) after their names have been announced.Now,many questions pop up (=surgen) in my mind.Who's the prom king and queen in 2º Bachillerato B??? you can vote here. I've attached a photograph of my prom night, that's me when I was 17,believe it or not....

MY OWN PRIVATE TRIBUTE TO HANK

a smile to remember ,by Charles Bukowski

we had goldfish and they circled around and around

in the bowl on the table near the heavy drapes

covering the picture window andmy mother, always smiling, wanting us all

to be happy, told me, "be happy Henry!"

and she was right: it's better to be happy if you

can

but my father continued to beat her and me several times a week while

raging inside his 6-foot-two frame because he couldn't

understand what was attacking him from within.

my mother, poor fish,wanting to be happy, beaten two or three times a

week, telling me to be happy: "Henry, smile!why don't you ever smile?"

and then she would smile, to show me how, and it was the

Saddest smile I ever saw

one day the goldfish died, all five of them,

they floated on the water, on their sides, their

eyes still open,and when my father got home he threw them to the cat

there on the kitchen floor and we watched as my mother

smiled

THE J-TEAM

Dear All,

I don't know if you remember the A-team.You are far too young to rememeber,when this TV series came out you were just a foetus, or just an idea in your parents' minds. Well,this was about four guys who did good and either captured the bad guys or punished them.In every single chapter there was a massive shootout (=intercambio de disparos), but nobody ever (and I mean EVER) died or even get injured.They also invented a tank or a fighter jet(=avión de guerra) out of rubble (=escombros).Now my colleagues Javier (Matute), Julio and Juanjo and I have been baptized (=hemos sido bautizados) by our colleagues 'the J-team' (our names start with 'J') in analogy with the TV series.My question is...who is who????Who's Hannibal Smith? (the mastermind)????Who's Templeton 'Faceman' Peck (in Spanish 'Fénix'),who's Mr.T Baracus???And...most importantly....Who's Murdock (the dumb/ crazy guy)????Looking forward to your answers...I got it pretty clear,by the way.

WEIRDO MAGNET

I'm a magnet for weirdos.I know,I've said this a thousand times,but I'm starting to get sick and tired of being the gutter of many people's psychological issues.STOOP ITTTT!!!!!!Yes, I'm talking to you,you think you are sooo intelligent,so clever that you have to speak with secret and profound words."Nobody knows anything" or things like that.Well,Mr.Smartash...guess what???I do know something,there it goes:"I like drinking coffee in the morning",don't go around telling people what they haven't asked you.."don't talk unless you are talked to", used to tell me my father, and he sure was right,partner.Don't patronize me with words you don't even understand,words you've borrowed from a movie about teen vampires or God only knows where you've taken them from.You sure need a hobby to make you stop being so weird!!!!Well,guys,this is my shot of morning ranting.Now,look up all the words you didn't understand,do me that favor....do yourselves that favor.

WHAT TYPE ARE YOU???

Dear All,

Last saturday we could see an exciting match.Needless to say, (=innecesario decir) I didn't really care about who would win the game,I just wanted to see an exciting game.I could also see how two different types of people met; On the one hand, an introverted, self-conscious type embodied (=personificado) in Leo Messi.On the other hand, the cocky (=chulito)type represented by CR9.

I personally think Messi is a far better player than the portuguese star, yet Ronaldo himself said at the end of the match that he was better than Messi.Just by saying that I knew Messi was better.Don't get me wrong (=no me malentendáis), I've always thought that there's nothing wrong about adopting a self-confident (=confiado en sí mismo)and even cocky attitude in life.But when you hear them both speaking,they're worlds apart (=como el día y la noche).

Which type are you???Who do you think is the best???

ME,SNOW-WHITE,LONDON

My first day at London Guildhall University was weird.Everybody spoke English.Since I had taken the degree in English studies,I guess I was the weird one.I went to my first class: Creative writing.The teacher assigned a paper for the following day.We had to analyse a text about a boy who detested his girlfriend's breath whenever she kissed him.After the class,the rugby team invited me to join them for a pint (=pinta)of beer...what could I say?I decided to start working at the University pub.I knew I'd meet lots of people and thus have lots of opportunities to speak English,so I applied for the job.

When I returned to my 'home' (a 3x3 dingy(=sucio) bedroom) I started to write my essay.The text was a symbolic version of snow white's(=blancanieves) apple: The apple (the kiss) was luring(=atrayente) and desirable,yet it contained poison (her breath),and similarly many things in life which seem attractive at first sight (=a primera vista) hide a pernicious element underneath (=esconden algo pernicioso por debajo). One week later,the teacher read my essay in front of the rest of the class and praised (=alabó) my work. That was a tough yet good start.

BACK HOME

Dear all,it's Tuesday morning and we're back home...(by 'home' I mean work,you'll understand in a few years).I'm all alone in the teachers' lounge and I have to prepare plenty of things I had left unfinished when I left.My easter holiday was good,I was able to sleep long hours,rest,read (Irvine Welsh's Filth) and see my nephews. They are fine and they say hello to all of you. It's not true,but anyway,I hope that makes you feel better.

I don't really know what I'm writing in this post or why I am writing at all,I need a double shot of coffee or a double shot of Smith n' Wesson, either one will do.My colleagues are now talking too loud,I understand foreigners when they say that Spaniards speak too loud.Well, I guess that means I'm back to work.I hope you don't give a hard time,little brats.See you in a couple of minutes,pranks.